Into the Wild Wood and Home Again

I used to like to read a few dystopian novels, but it's isn't my favorite genre. My favorite was Brave New World by Aldous Huxley. I waded my way through others, and found them not to my taste. The Hunger Games trilogy (as it was then, and I know there's another book now), Fahrenheit 451 (not bad), The Giver (hate the ending, too much of a cop-out, imho), are all perennial favorites, but I don't gravitate to them. One other novel that really stands out, though, is Childhood's End by Arthur C. Clarke. It blurs the line between dystopian fiction and science fiction, and it presents a chilling ending to what is masked as a utopian premise. That one is a good one, but hard to teach. And as far as 1984 goes, it made me incredibly angry, so much so I can't read it again. There's also the movies, so many of them, everything from Star Wars movies to Mad Max . Next up: Minority Report ? It's scary to think that these are not really feeling all that fictional s...

Back to the deep-freeze, temperature-wise. Three degrees, and I hear the state trucks rumbling by, so I'm sure it'll be messy driving again. It's still dark out, so I can't quite verify this, but it tracks. Classes continue to go pretty well; we'll see what comes of the critical analysis essays the seniors in Am Lit are working on; today, we will have individual conferences on their drafts. I have a couple of kids I'm a little concerned about, so the "honeymoon" is probably over. Ah, the usual stuff. On the home front, Holly went ice skating yesterday, and from the photos and what I've been told, she did pretty well. She loves to try new things, and loves sports. By the end of her first hour, she was, as I'm informed, ready to go play hockey with the big girls who were assembling for team practice. Um... not until you can go without the crates, sweetie, but okay... I love her can-do spirit.  I'm not commenting on the political chaos today, ...

Is it just me, or is this month just brutally annoying? I am hopeful of a shift in the energies: maybe it's the planetary alignment, maybe it's the East Coast earthquake we had two days ago, the incessant cold, the toxic sludge in the news... whatever the root cause, my zip ain't what it should be. That all said, things move along with my little book, and I should be expending my brain-power on figuring out the next steps for the book launch event and so on. And I should be planning a quiz bowl tournament for the end of March. And I should be reading things that fill my mind and heart with good things.  That last one is something that probably should come first. I feel depleted. I suspect we all do. So, short message today, but that's all I have for now. I hope the sun peeks out later. C

I'm up... it's dark, but not really "cold," at 30 degrees. Snow in the forecast, of course, but nothing that is supposed to amount to even shovel-able. That's fine by me. And the frigid temps are on their way again, starting Thursday.  Is it just me, or has January just about worn out its welcome this year? Maybe it's the tidal wave of toxicity in the news, maybe it's the long stretches of cold that require heavy coats, boots, gloves, and a lot of patience. Yes, I know the days are getting lighter earlier-- a good thing-- but this month is interminable.  We are on to week 2 of the new semester, and so far, the kids have been meeting my challenges cheerfully and willingly. The creative writing trio I have are enjoying the prompts, too. Yesterday, we explored the Golden Shovel form ; they are having a ball figuring it out. At other times, students have given up quickly when presented with a challenge like this, but not this crew. They are fun to have in clas...

It boggles my mind that people think that the president-- any US president-- can do a single thing, really, about the prices of groceries. Yes, the price of eggs and of chicken are going up; there's a rampant avian flu outbreak. Research and development of the vax for the disease has been compromised, so there's that wrinkle. In that way, I suppose the president has an impact: the prices will continue to go up if no solution is found. The lack of labor to pick vegetables at this time of the year especially will make it expensive to get things that are not grown in one's own locale. I doubt there's a line of people waiting to take over those jobs, especially given the working conditions and overall pay rate.  I paid attention in high school. I understand basic economics (things like supply/demand, what a tariff is, what makes a free market work). I did well in biology class. I read, learned, listened, and talked to teachers who were patient enough to explain things, and ...

Trotting out some poems at the Open Mic yesterday was sort of fun! I've read a few poems here or there, but only at closed group things, the conferences I've attended with friends or the online workshops and classes I regularly participate in. The group was a smallish one at the Coop, but for the space, it was full. I knew only a couple of people there, but all were kind and some were openly complimentary, so that was nice.  It was a decent debut, I think. My friend Ruth came from about an hour away, too, and she also participated (though she hadn't planned to)-- that was fun! Ruth makes me laugh; in an off-the-cuff comment she made midway through her set of songs, she mentioned that open mics are nice because they are open mics, and if "you want to juggle pigs, go ahead and do your thing." I can't help but laugh: she totally nailed down the egalitarian nature of community talent-gathers like open mic events.  The next one is scheduled for February 22nd, and I...

Those who know me well also know that I don't re-read books very often. There are a few that I have, though, among them Siddhartha (Hesse), the LOTR and The Hobbit , The Secret Garden (Burnett), The Little Prince (Saint Exupery), and obviously, the things I have taught in classes over the years. Because of the emotional/physical/spiritual turmoil I am feeling lately, I sense that I am drowning a bit. I have been clinging to music from my childhood-- all the folk/protest songs-- since I saw the Dylan biopic on Monday. At times, I find it hard to breathe deeply, to get my bearings-- I tend to borrow and cling to stress, which is really unhealthy (I KNOW), but it's also how I'm built.  Today, I feel like I have to- I MUST- read T he Wind and the Willows . Maybe because it is comforting, maybe because of the memories I associate with it, but mostly, I need to feel safe. And when my dad was reading it to me, I felt safe and loved. And frankly, our world is on fire, and I don...

  "The children are always ours, every single one of them, all over the globe; and I am beginning to suspect that whoever is incapable of recognizing this may be incapable of morality." ~James Baldwin I honestly have not recovered my equilibrium (okay, I have not recovered that in months, truly) about the raids, the hatred, the vicious policy pronouncements. And I know there are more to come. And I know that I expected them. I was just hoping, as many of us were, that a few sane individuals would do something-- SOMETHING --to put some guardrails on this massive dismantling of all of our social norms and supports. Until proposals/bills/erstwhile mandates come before Congress, aside from the "hearings" of the Cabinet nominees, there's precious little that can or will be done. All of these EOs bypass legislative scrutiny. Many are flawed in their wording and will be challenged in the court system. But the intent, the misery that is intended for so many people, is p...

I was going to write all about a very successful collaborative poem thing I have my creative writing students working on-- they love it, it's going well, and they want to continue. But I can't this morning. Instead, I want to just briefly mention the potential kidnapping of school children as they get off the bus at the end of their school day. ICE agents may be waiting (per a notice in Worcester, MA ) at the bus stops to snatch children they assume are "illegal" (though no child is illegal... we can debate the semantics). Bus drivers have been told if they see agents waiting, to hold all the children on the bus and call it in.  No one should remove any child from anywhere without a legal warrant and their parents being present. Anything else is kidnapping.  I am scared and heartbroken for these children and their families. A raid/round-up of people already happened in Newark, New Jersey ; legal adults and US citizens, including a military veteran, were swept up in th...

We grow accustomed to the Dark - When Light is put away - As when the Neighbor holds the Lamp To witness her Good bye - A Moment - We uncertain step For newness of the night - Then fit our Vision to the Dark - And meet the Road - erect - And so of larger - Darknesses - Those Evenings of the Brain - When not a Moon disclose a sign - Or Star - come out - within - The Bravest - grope a little - And sometimes hit a Tree Directly in the Forehead - But as they learn to see - Either the Darkness alters - Or something in the sight Adjusts itself to Midnight - And Life steps almost straight. -- Emily Dickinson, 1862 I needed to choose a poem to dictate and discuss with my Am Lit class, and I really felt at a loss of which poem to choose. Why not just open a book randomly, and go with it? I did, and this poem was the result. I'd never read it before today, there in class, with all these expectant kids looking to me to get the ball rolling. Wow.  Talk about bibliomancy. This poem gave me a me...

I've not been sleeping well again. And I know that it's due to an overwhelming sense of dread and the stress that goes with it. I, like so many other citizens of the United States, will need to find a path forward in order to function in a healthy way.  I read this morning about the pardon of a truly odious person who founded and ran a website that was primarily used to funnel illegal drugs into our country. The avalanche of pardons and executive orders (demands) is too hard to process at this time, and someone --several someones-- will have to tackle that mess. In other words, I have to figure out how to not pick up what is not mine to carry. Wish me luck.  That all said, the first day of the new semester seemed to go well. My American Lit class focused on Rockwell's Four Freedoms , and they have a personal narrative essay to draft for Friday that explores which of the four freedoms depicted is the most important to them. We looked at the pictures closely, and I asked them...

But I’ll know my song well before I start singin’ And it’s a hard, it’s a hard, it’s a hard, it’s a hard It’s a hard rain’s a-gonna fall... Bob Dylan, A Hard Rain's A-Gonna Fall I went to see A Complete Unknown for the 12:45 show in St. J; I was intentionally avoiding all social media and television, and I really wanted to see the movie. I'm glad I went. I mean, I was blinking back tears several times while I was watching it: where the hell has our country gone? This movie recounted a part of my childhood-- granted, it was set a few years before I came along, but my father made damned sure I knew all about folk music, Dylan and Baez and so many others. I want so much to be able to talk about this film with him, but since he's not with me on this plane of existence anymore, I have to puzzle it all out by myself. Yes, I know that the film-maker took some creative license with the facts, but the Truth shines through. And yes, Dylan was a bit of a jackass sometimes. Timothee...

Teatime, Jan. 20, 2025 Let it whistle, let it scream, Let it raise a mighty steam To give a strident voice For those who have no choice. Let it wail, let it hiss Because it's come to this-- Let it be a hot disruption To call out mass corruption. Let it boil, let it bubble, Let it get into "good trouble"-- Let us steep, then let us pour 'Til there isn't any more. Let it burn, let it scald Let us all be truly called To stand up for our nation With true determination, And when the time has come And a victory is won, Then we'll have a cup of tea And dream of what could be...

Strange as it may seem, I feel like a second post today is warranted. Not that I'm feeling any more at ease about the coming existential threats, but today, the second reading in church reminded me that I am not without power. The reading was from 1 Corinthians 4-11: Now there are varieties of gifts, but the same Spirit.   5  And there are varieties of ministries, and the same Lord.   6  There are varieties of effects, but the same God who works all things in all  persons .   7  But to each one is given the manifestation of the Spirit for the common good.   8  For to one is given the word of wisdom through the Spirit, and to another the word of knowledge according to the same Spirit;   9  to another faith  [ d ] by the same Spirit, and to another gifts of  [ e ] healing  [ f ] by the one Spirit,   10  and to another the  [ g ] effecting of  [ h ] miracles, and to ...

  …   Yeah, my blood's so mad, feels like coagulatin' I'm sittin' here just contemplatin' I can't twist the truth, it knows no regulation Handful of senators don't pass legislation And marches alone can't bring integration When human respect is disintegratin' This whole crazy world is just too frustratin' …  And you tell me Over and over and over again, my friend How you don't believe We're on the eve of destruction... --Barry McGuire, Eve of Destruction (1965) Today's song in my head when I woke up. This is one I grew up with; it's one year older than I am. I only wish it didn't feel so true. C

Today offers a small reprieve from the very cold temperatures we've had lately. I don't mind, since I have errands and groceries to get later. I was just consulting my to-do list, and I see that I can check one thing off: grades. I stayed the course yesterday, and I graded three full sets of papers before 2:30 (my eyes are super tired today). Last evening, after dinner, I entered those grades-- the ones for the college (both of my classes are dual credit) that required learning a new platform first, and the ones for my school. All that's left is to "finalize" those school grades, but I think there's something different about Power School, and my old cheat sheet on how to do it is no help. So, that will have to wait until I get directions.  That all said, the semester is done. Amen. It was a decent enough one, but had the usual bumpy ending. At least all of the kids turned in their final work. That helps. No chasing kids post-semester to try to get things done....

When I was in grade school, we had to learn all the --isms and other words that were associated with them. I know that it was training us to "spot" Communism-- I am a child of the cold war era. That said, the word "oligarchy" had been associated with corruption in Soviet Russia, and we all knew that it was a bad thing for a select group of powerful people to run the show behind closed doors. An oligarchy was a bad thing. At least, I thought we all knew that. From the looks of things, some people took it as a challenge, as a way to run a country like their own private supply of money. In fact, I would have thought that most of the people who are my age or a little older-- even 20 years older or so-- would not want to be associated with those manipulative policies that we were all taught were evil. Unfortunately, it looks like I was wrong. The oligarchs of the social studies lessons were cruel, heartless, and abusive to the common worker. We also learned that the Robb...

It seems I've somewhat broken my promise to not get flustered (at least in print) about the national issues that are engulfing the media, and by extension, all of us. Sorry about that. Sort of. I am, however, so pleased that the Hamas/Israel ceasefire plan came before January 20th. The credit-claiming has already begun, and that makes me furious. It doesn't surprise me, given the "who" but still-- not cool. Not cool at all. Respect should be given to the people who have tirelessly worked at this negotiation for over a year, not the ones who were invited to participate much more recently, who should be helping keep this agreement on track.  That happens in our own lives, too, doesn't it? I mean yes, as long as the job gets done, it should be all okay-- but still, when someone has done something really well, they ought to be given the nod of thanks.  So, enough said about that group of icky sticky humans.  It's cold out.  It's dark out. And that's both l...

I'm following the confirmation hearings, and I can't say I feel like things are going to be okay if/when these nominees are confirmed. Bickering back  and shouting over Senators, sidestepping questions, and out-and-out not being able to answer basic questions that directly relate to the positions... yeah, it appears that being at all qualified for a job is no longer a concern. Just... loyalty to a demagogue. And we can't even hope that the people around them who actually know their business will cover for them, since there is a promised "purge" of all employees-- they are being asked such things as to whom and how much they donated in the last election. It's scary. There's been times I've been passed over for positions that I was qualified for; it hurts like hell, honestly. And when you see who they do hire, and that person does not work out, it hurts again and again. That said, I've never been in charge of, say, an 800+ billion dollar budget. Nor ...

Yesterday was one of those "pecked to death by chickens" days with a thick layer of Monday all over it. Students were okay, except the couple that totally disappointed me (did not turn in work that was already given an extension). Then we had a union meeting to discuss the new proposed contract, and though I won't and can't discuss the terms, let's just leave it at I, for the first time in my professional career, lost my cool. Not a good thing, but I did email an apology to the president, who was very understanding. The issue won't likely get better, and me being the only part-time employee, I get hit harder than others due to my "benefits" being pro-rated. And so it goes, right? Sucktastic. But I have a job, and I'll be paid for it. So, I'll behave. Then I went and got groceries at 4pm-- whipped in and out, and then checked the mail. I got my temporary handicap placard, which will come in handy when I'm out and about and the walking is n...

I am feeling a little bleary-eyed this morning, mainly because I was sleeping very soundly and I didn't want to get out of the warm bed. I suspect most folks feel the same way, especially on the first day of the work week. Alas, it's Monday, and it's time to caffeinate and get moving.  It was a really nice weekend in a lot of ways, though. A true weekend, in that I didn't grade papers. I have a mountain of laundry that needs to be folded, and it's all still sitting in baskets. I didn't even get my groceries yet. I took-- gasp -- time off. Saturday, I was in a wonderful writing class all day-- I have three new drafts, and ideas for a couple more, and those will build a connected series of persona poems. That was great fun. And then yesterday, Meg and I took off after I got home from church and we went to Tilton. It was not a huge shopping excursion, but it was nice to get out of town, I did find a couple of things here and there (okay, a chunky cream-colored card...

"Blackbird singing in the dead of night/ Take these broken wings and learn to fly/ All your life/ You were only waiting for this moment to arise..." Paul McCartney, acoustic version, " Blackbird " I've written before about how I often (okay almost always) wake up with music already running through my head. Today, it's this song, this version. I have no clue what my subconscious mind is up to, but it feels like I should pay attention.  Have a good day, C

It's so strange when you take down the Christmas tree and all the decorations. I didn't even decorate a lot, but the cavernous quality of the space, and the somewhat bland look to the rooms, is almost palpable. My living room walls are solid wood paneling, quite nice, actually, but they are wood. And the thermal curtains over the big window are mushroom grey. My furniture is an odd collection of equally muted tones. It all happened that way-- the boring palette was not intentionally chosen-- and for the most part, it's both comfortable and restful. But the predominant tone feels (and looks) pretty beige. Like my closet in winter, actually.  Beige Grey Brown Black  I've been making a concerted effort to include some pops of color in my wardrobe, but the house remains, for a nice term, neutral. I don't think I'd be happy in a color-chaos; I've seen other homes with startling shades on the walls and a plethora of busy wall art-decorations-ephemera clustered all...

I just read Heather Cox Richardson's daily letter , in which she does a nice job of recapping the highlights from the eulogies given at President Carter's funeral. I am particularly struck by one phrase in President Biden's speech, that challenges me to dust myself off and to keep trying, keep working for what I know is important: "Character, Biden said, is not about being perfect, for none of us are perfect. It’s about 'asking ourselves: Are we striving to do…the right things?… What are the values that animate our spirit? To operate from fear or hope, ego or generosity? Do we show grace? Do we keep the faith when it’s most tested?' ” And I know that my faith in my country, in some people I had considered friends and neighbors, has been sorely tested. Like President Carter, I tend to think more globally. I want the planet to exist for all people, and folks need to be treated with respect and love. Some people make that last one really hard, and that's a tes...

Today is a national day of mourning for former President Jimmy Carter. It's also a scary day for a lot of people in California; the wildfires raging around LA are not contained, and the water is running scarce. Of course, there have been "those politicians" who have gone off the rails yet again, politicizing a massive tragedy to try to score points by outright lies. And there's our current president on-site, pledging help.  The stark contrast between common decency and bloviation is so apparent right now, it's breathtaking.  The list of bills in the new Congress are also breathtaking: if any of them pass, it'll change how we live, here on the front lines, in everywhere America. And I can promise you this, the changes will be the cause of yet more chaos, hurt, and economic turmoil. Buckle up, folks.  So, the fires rage literally and figuratively, and the nation lays a good man to rest. He tried to make life easier for so many people, and succeeded in ways that...

January feels both like a form of enforced stasis and a rocket on rails. The weather is cold, not too snowy here (though who knows, that could change), and I dislike being outside on windy days. I'm such a homebody, but one who yearns to see and do-- it's a conundrum. It's not quite cabin fever (yet), but I would not mind breaking routine to go to a museum or some live music or something. We tried that last Friday, the live music, but I knew we were in for it when the performer began her set with "The Wheels on the Bus Go Round and Round." Seriously. I know there were families with little ones in attendance, but the paying customers with beers in their hands were not amused. O well. The food was good.  That said-- rocket on rails. The semester is coming to a close next Friday. I'm glad, in a way-- I don't mind shifting what we talk about. But so many kids are out lately-- a few because they are sick (it is winter), but others because of doctor's appoin...