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Showing posts from February, 2024

Girding myself for a visit to the dentist--and having to tackle the insurance industry

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Edit: The insurance never received the paperwork. So now I'm not annoyed with them, but instead, with the vagaries of the US Postal Service.  Always something. I never used to worry or get nervous about going to the dentist. After all, I'd made it over 50 years with no cavities. Then, a tooth cracked deeply, it was during pandemic times, and I had to put off dealing with it-- and it had to be pulled (cue: nightmare scenario with not enough numbing). A year later, the same thing happened to the opposite tooth-- and I went to a different dentist, better experience, but one fraught with panic that necessitated not only special care but also mild sedatives. So, two teeth gone. In January, I underwent a full evaluation, and there are several pin-hole type cavities that must be dealt with before I end up with a really bad situation. What the hell??? Aging is not for the faint of heart. Or someone with little up-front cash.  My new dentist does not accept insurance; you pay the bill,...

...perhaps they need to go back to science class?

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Measles. IVF. Solar panels. Wind farms. Guns-guns-guns.  The list could go on, but what is the common factor? Sheer, willful ignorance. Those who apparently either slept through or skipped science class are making life really hard for those of us who would like to survive. It is entirely disheartening when the so-called Surgeon General of Florida is deferring to parents' choice, even questioning the need to vaccinate their kids against one of the most contagious diseases known to mankind.  It is also really confusing and disturbing when elected officials such as Tommy Tuberville (yeah, the guy who single-handedly held up all military appointments and promotions for months) decide that "we need more children" is the reason to rail on against IVF.  Guns kill. The statistics are startling and very painful: the leading cause of death in children in the United States is gun violence. (Maybe that's why we need more children? Someone should ask the GOP.) But we can't d...

The danger in "othering" played out both large and small--

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I started this morning by first putting in a load of laundry and starting the dishwasher. Then, I settled in with a cup of coffee to read Heather Cox Richardson's daily essay, this time about the creeping diplomatic shuffle in Gaza. What appalls me is that any group of human beings can declare that another group should live or die, and in Netanyahu's case, that Palestinians don't actually exist. It's like how Putin declares that Ukraine and its native inhabitants don't exist as a separate and distinct people/country. Talk about "cancel culture"-- it's upsetting, to say the least.  It's not just "over there" (where ever "there" is)-- it is right here, too. Demonizing other human beings and "othering" them is nothing new, but gee, don't you think we'd see this evil and destructive pattern and finally, FINALLY , reject such ignorant behavior? And yes, there are times when I do the same-- usually temporary, usually...

VERY strange dreams--

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I had the oddest dream that Lauren Boebert bought a large house here in town, and she and her current paramour were supposedly renovating it and buying adjacent property in order to open an inn-- but really they were setting up a MAGA base camp. And I knew about their secret plan, and they found out I knew, and G and I were in danger: they left our hot water running in our house in order to flood the place or at least run up the water bill, and they poisoned some expensive liqueur I had bought that was strangely purple (made with pea blossom, I think).  Needless to say, I woke up, and the world is still safe from Boebert incursions. What the hell. I hope your day is less eventful... C

A change in plans, and I'm glad to live here...

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Well, today started out a little different than what I'd originally thought it would-- but all to the better, in a lot of ways. It's a good thing for everyone that Meg et al live next door; her furnace was on the fritz again, and we got up to her letting herself in to bring Holly where it was warm while she waiting for the furnace guru to show up and figure it out.  Long story short, the furnace is fixed, and we got a chance to have an impromptu Sunday breakfast together: Finnish Pancake (a type of dutch baby custard), maple sausage, and fresh raspberries. And hot coffee. Lots. G had to go to work, so it was just us three, and it has been delightful. Yes, I didn't go to in-person church, but the last time I checked, God is everywhere, and He would likely rather I was home to help in this mini-situation. And we have livestream Mass, so that works.  What's interesting, too, is how, in Littleton, it seems that our young adults are bucking a national trend of some decades...

In praise of sweet little movies that the critics didn't care for...

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While idly flipping through the possible free movies on the television last night, I stumbled across a delightful little film titled The Lightkeepers . It was a sweet story, a little formulaic, but not too sappy. What was a really nice surprise was the cast: Blythe Danner, Mamie Gummer, Richard Dreyfuss, Bruce Dern! The film came out in 2009, and it didn't receive rave reviews, but I didn't care one bit. It was just what a cold Friday night after a long week required. It was set in 1912 on Cape Cod, and the costumes were lovely. The setting was refreshing; I am tired of cold, mud, and snow.  Isn't that what movies are for? They don't have to be great art-- those movies are good, but they are more for cerebral moments, for long conversations with other, like-minded people. The Lightkeepers was like a fuzzy blanket, made for a chilly night and relaxation.  Too often, we criticize popular comforts for being too pedestrian, too average, too...accessible. But why? I like so...

Another wet winter carnival is upon us...

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Wet. Sloppy. Snow showers, with rain in the forecast. Another Winter Carnival has arrived.  Climate change has brought practical changes even to this rather innocuous tradition-- there will be no snow sculptures (we have bare ground in a lot of places), no sled races, no snow shoe events. The games are mostly indoors (except the egg toss, amen, that makes a mess).  So, today, I'll go to school wearing my required class color (blue), and sit in the gym for hours, watching kids compete. There are no real "honors"-- except the bragging rights. It is a good way to blow off steam, have fun, and launch into vacation. It's too bad some families use this as an excuse to head out of town early, though-- there are kids who will miss this, year after year, and that's not their fault. I suppose, though, in the larger sense, a day that is non-academic is not a lot to miss. But if these events are supposed to build community among the students, it's hard to do that when the...

Happy B'day to my fella--

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Today, my spouse achieved 60 years. (I hate "turns"-- milk turns.) The other day, he was a smidgen grumpy, and declared that "aging is nothing to celebrate" (the question was about his preference for dinner). I wanted to retort that it sure beats not aging.  Getting older has its challenges, and not everyone has the same challenges at the same age, regardless of what the ads on TV will tell you. Sometimes the vision goes early, or arthritis sets in at a younger age than the "average." Sometimes, if you are lucky, all you lose is a little hair. Maybe it's hearing. Maybe, nothing changes, at least for a long time. For us, we have our lists of things we have to accommodate for, but mostly, we manage.  So today, G will work a couple of hours at his side job, then do pretty much as he pleases. Seems good to me! Meg is making home made meatballs and sauce, to go with pasta, and I'll rustle up a salad. There may be garlic bread. And cake! She made a lovel...

Winter Carnival Shenanigans

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This is the middle of Winter Carnival Week at school, and for each day, there has been a dress-up theme. If class advisors participate, the class gets an extra point. Usually, I'm up for at least a few of the days, but it's been really cold and frankly, dressing for "Beach or Biker" or "Formal Wear" didn't click with me. Today, however, is "Barbie or Ken." I am not going Malibu Barbie, or Pilot Barbie, or even Teacher Barbie-- I'm throwing it back to the one I inherited, the hand-me-down Barbie I got from my aunt when I was little. It was the original one, with the black and white striped one-piece bathing suit. NO, I'm not wearing a bathing suit to work. That Barbie, however, had some classy clothing, none of which was hot pink. I have a black wool swing coat with a faux fur collar that will do quite nicely, thanks. And I can manage the eye makeup (but no blue, no no no). I even found a bright pink lipstick.  So, 1960s Barbie it is. A ...

It's cold, and there are pretty dresses at the store--- O, February--

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You know what I wish? I wish some designer out there, likely a local-ish one, could come up with appropriate Easter finery for little kids who live in the north country. All the pretty, frilly, sleeveless dresses and pinafores won't hold up to seven below. Okay, I know Easter is a little over a month away, but it will not be warm enough on March 31st, either. So often, I wanted to buy pretty little dresses and hats, white mary-jane patent shoes, little purses for Meg when she was small. Nope. Those pretty things are for children in warmer places. Here, we are still shoveling snow, wearing boots, and puffy coats cover up whatever we put the kids in for clothes. The fashions more often seen for Christmas are more fitting for north country Easters.  That all said, it's nice to wander around in TJMaxx and see lighter, brighter colors. I'm fast approaching that time of year when I get entirely sick of wearing the same ol' brown-beige-grey-black. I try to spice it up with oli...

The appeal of epics...

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This seems to be an odd trend in my reading life of late: I am reading new translations of epics. I mean, how nerdy can it get? I'm still poking my way through the Iliad (no rush), and enjoying it immensely. Though reading the accounts of how each local "hero" got impaled and died while eating breakfast can be a little off-putting. I listened to the On Being podcast the other day, in which Padraig O'Tuama was discussing the new translation of Beowulf ; it's more vernacular-driven, and I'm intrigued. I found it on Amazon (yeah, I know, big A, but still), and it'll be here on Wednesday.  Why epics? Why now? I suppose it's partly because I'm teaching literature classes exclusively this term. But maybe it's because the world is a freakin' hot mess right now, and something has to tie it all together before it unravels. Epics have little to do with reported facts, but everything to do with cultural Truths. The hopes, dreams, hurts, and victorie...

The dangerous game, and innocents are pawns--

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So, it's Sunday, and I'm trying to hold onto my Lenten promises. Then, I read Heather Cox Richardson's post from last night, the one that connects all the very dangerous dots about Paul Manafort, the Russian plan to overthrow Ukraine's government, destabilize NATO and Europe, and the proposed involvement (and achieved objectives) of the 2016 Trump campaign under Manafort's stewardship. In short, the U.S. has blood on its hands because of machinations done in his name and with his knowledge, and with the current MAGA refusal, again at Trump's insistence, to further fund Ukraine, they are starting to lose ground.  I have a former student who volunteered to go and fight for Ukraine; he is still there. He went to fight because of injustice. There are so many people fighting for their very lives. Without further help, not only will Ukraine be compromised, but the forcible reunification of the Soviet bloc will be quite likely. Or another World War. And this, all becau...

A breath-taking admission from a dangerous man--

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It is common knowledge that former Fox talking head Tucker Carlson is a manipulator, and he is a primary "advisor" to the current GOP front-runner. His recent junket to Moscow to "interview" Putin does not pass the smell test: he asked no real questions, and Putin talked over him, telling his fantastical version of, well, everything, for about 30 minutes. Who travels all the way to Moscow to sit down and be lectured? I suspect there may be more to his trip, and the chat was a cover. But that may well be a conspiracy theory. That said, this, as written about yesterday by noted historian Heather Cox Richardson in her daily post, "Letters from an American": On Monday, in Dubai, Egyptian journalist Emad El Din Adeeb asked Carlson why, when interviewing Putin, he “did not talk about Navalny, about assassinations, about restrictions on opposition in the coming elections.” Carlson replied by equating Russia and the U.S., saying: “Every leader kills people…. Some ...

A poetry reading that I'm a part of-- "you come, too..." (really, I need the emotional support...)

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Hi, Friends! So, most of you know that my first chapbook, What to Keep , is scheduled for release next February from Finishing Line Press. There are a lot of "hurdles" along the way in the next several months, and I will have more information closer to the fall, such as when the book will go on pre-sale. That said, I have to bite the bullet, screw my courage to the sticking point, and all of the other suck-it-up-buttercup bumper stickers and start putting my face --and my poems-- out there for people to get to know me. Otherwise, no one will buy the book, I won't make the pre-sale requirements, and the book will possibly not see the light of day (yeah, there are hurdles).  I've been invited to be one of the readers for the tenth anniversary anthology from Smoky Quartz , which is a regional publication here in New Hampshire, based in the Monadnock area. They are lovely to work with, and they have published a few of my poems over the last couple of years. I'll be re...

Grandparenting: A blessing and a silent national crisis

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How quickly we fall out of practice. G and Holly arrived at 4:55 this morning, at the front door. I was supposed to be up and have the side door unlocked-- they beat me by five minutes. What a start! I heard the front door and panicked that I'd overslept, but nope, they were a few minutes early. Then, there was the rush and tumble of early morning, sans coffee... shot out of a cannon much? Holly is in great spirits, so there's that blessing.  We got our morning off to a better start than I'd figured. But omg-- we had such a good system figured out when we were Holly-watching during that long month and a half-- and now, we're figuring it all out again, on the fly.  She's been changed twice already, and she's dressed and has had her milk. Peace reigns. PBS Kids for the win. We'll have breakfast in a little bit, and then we'll tackle the getting-bags-and-kid-to-the-car-and-in-the-car-seat. It's 8 degrees, so that adds to the challenge-- the car seat is ...

Ash Wednesday Musings

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What to give up? Being raised a laissez-faire Catholic, my family kinda-sorta did Lent; as in, o yeah, it's Ash Wednesday. And o yeah, we're supposed to give something up. We didn't attend church past my 6th grade year (and hardly before). We didn't really observe meatless Fridays, fasting, or any of the other requirements. To call us Convenience Catholics would have been a stretch.  It's strange, then, I suppose, that I embraced my faith tradition as an adult. I mean, it truly hit me that I wanted to go to church, I wanted to belong. I went to confession (don't ask how long it'd been-- probably since I made my first Communion), I started going regularly, and I found comfort in the quiet. No one can call you, ask you for a favor, or anything else, really, when you are kneeling in a pew. It got my week started off right.  Fast forward a couple years, and G and I got our vows blessed--yup, married that dude twice. And we raised Meg in the church, too-- CCD, ch...

Short Note on Global War

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I get so damned angry and sad when I read about what the GOP Frontrunner says. Captain Chaos would like to manufacture WWIII so he can, in his mind, be a hero by doing what? Negotiating the end of the global tempest he so deeply craves? Making world leaders turn to him in their despair as the last hope on the planet? What the hell? and literally, he wants to create hell on earth. And there are far too many people who support him.  This is the end result of feeding a bloated ego too long; the Reality TV Star creates the biggest, most tv-worthy reality show of them all: global war.  I'm pretty sure we won't survive another term with this guy.  Pray for some sort of sanity, C

Quiet Super Bowl 58-- and my favorite ad

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I feel old.  Seriously, while the halftime show at the Super Bowl was non-controversial, I honestly did not recognize most of the performers (literally, the only one I knew was Alicia Keys). The music was somewhat familiar to me --my daughter, who is 31, knew all the words, I'm told. So, clearly, that soundtrack must have been playing in the background while she was growing up. The game was moderately interesting, but no "super star" plays, none that I saw, anyhow. All I could think of was how young the two quarterbacks are-- and that, in a few months, I, too, will be 58. It was nice to see Joe Montana on the screen-- that was a welcome flashback to my own younger years.  In all, the annual secular holiday was pretty tame. We had some good food, family time, and so on. Meg and her little crew left just before half time. Then, it was just G and me, our recliners, and the game. Quiet. I had little vested interest in whichever team won, so I didn't get too wound up. The ...

I got some sleep--now, onward: football, work, Disney movies, and committee meetings...

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Well, I suppose my slightly whiny post yesterday served its purpose of kicking me in the pants. I got several poems read in the book I'm going to be writing about, got the chores and errands done, and did it all by 12:30. Goals met.  Today, I'll work my way through the papers I need to assess; I have no illusions that they'll be amazing, but I am hopeful that they will be relatively cogent. The kids are good kids, and the sophomores, especially, are eager to learn and do. They actually told me on Friday that not only is the class not as hard as they thought it would be (hehehe), but they think it's fun. Yay! British Lit is the foundation of what I love about teaching literature, and we've done quite a lot in three weeks. So, this first round of essays will likely need editing, but I hope that they are getting at the meat of it. I think they are, from conversations, so we shall see.  I'll also be working on some relatively not-that-healthy-but-okay-enough food to...

Too much busy/ not enough balance

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Best-laid plans oft gang agley , eh? Lately, I feel like I can't quite catch up. Nothing's really changed, but the personal deadlines I've set, the writing goals, the reading goals, have all been shoved along the datebook, square after square, date after date, after month. I kinda-sorta feel bad about it, but not as bad I should. Maybe it's winter blahs? Maybe it's the incredibly busy stretch we've been in? I dunno, but I have a book to read/review, and there's a bunch of submission deadlines looming, and I can't get out of my own way.  It's not like I'm filling my days with un-useful things: there's always house chores, and babysitting, and errands and school stuff. And I am reading that lovely translation of the Iliad , but even that is getting set aside far too often. I'm lucky if I can get two pages read a day.  I'm tired. No lie. And I can't seem to do anything cogent in the evening time; my eyes and brain are exhausted by th...

Water-- a few musings, maybe something I need to write about?

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" I’ve known rivers: I’ve known rivers ancient as the world and older than the flow of human blood in human veins." --Langston Hughes A friend mentioned rivers as physical things and as a means of connection, both actual and metaphorical, yesterday. I've been pondering that idea on and off since I read her blog. So many poets, so many songs, all focus on rivers in those ways. Immediately, my brain bubbled up with Langston Hughes' " The Negro Speaks of Rivers. " Then, various bits and phrases from songs wandered across my brain, everything from songs that rightly belong in the early Americana songbook to one of my favorites, Carly Simon's "Let the River Run." There is nothing more necessary and more timeless than water. Rivers, lakes, streams, the wide ocean and inland seas-- all have been written about in words of praise, wonder, and sometimes, fear. We are mostly water, in our own bodies. Water is a scarcity, water is dangerous, water is life-...

Toxicity at the highest level, and a measure of sanity here at home--

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  I should not be surprised, ever, by the incivility and inhumanity of so many people who are elected to "run" this country. Yesterday, in Congress, more examples of outright greed, obstinacy, and ignorance took center stage. Yet again. I'm frankly scared about what is going on; there is a clear and present danger to our country in the obvious manipulation of Congress by a certain candidate. Human lives are being used as fodder for the feeding of a bloated ego. It's destructive, and I don't know that we, as a country, will ever recover fully from this fever dream.  That said, this morning, I started my day off by reading the account of what occurred at the local level, the deliberative session (part one) for the warrant articles that we'll be voting on in March. There was a little more light at the end of the tunnel provided by the hard-working, civic-minded people here in town. The issues we face here are a good indication of what the country as a whole is fa...

Writing the World's Worst Country Music Song --for a grade!

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Yesterday, in Brit Lit, we took a brief look at the ballad form. We read a few from the textbook, things like "Sir Patrick Spens" and "Get Up and Bar the Door." Then, we went to youtube, where I selected some more modern ballads, such standards as "Margaritaville," "Gonna Hire a Wino," and "Friends in Low Places." We talked about what makes a ballad, structure-wise: things like telling a story, having a repeated or incremental refrain, etc.  Then, I let them loose with a challenge: using five required elements (momma, dog, truck, prison, and alcohol), they had to create the world's worst country music ballad. Three verses, refrain, and all-- and they could do this with a partner. They also had to be able to either act it out or sing it-- perform in some way. All in 25 minutes.  The results were hilarious. One had a released inmate wanting to return to prison, because he missed his jailer, Becky from Kentucky (who had a dog on the po...

I have to say, this is a mess--

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I've been dancing around the topic of national politics, mainly because the issues are huge, the ignorance is vast, and my heart hurts every time I think of what a mess it all is, and how it will affect each and every one of us in the cheap seats. While too many people want to make this mess about individuals and what they do/did, didn't do, or should do, it's really all about us, as a group. There are real issues to tackle but those in positions of actual influence, at least a lot of them, are more fixated on the blame game. It's disheartening. Yes, there is plenty of blame to go around, but that alone won't shift the situations.  I'm not suggesting that we can or should just let illegal behaviors slide--no no no. But that is not enough. My dad always said that most people would rather fix the blame than fix the problem-- he's not wrong. Those who have created this crisis should (and I hope, will) be held accountable. Otherwise, we have nothing at all to st...

Both Sides Now--

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Congratulations to Joni Mitchell. Her voice is part of the soundtrack of my childhood, thanks to my dad. He would love this. I miss him. The lyrics hit harder now. Joni Mitchell at the 2024 Grammys " I've looked at life from both sides now From win and lose and still somehow It's life's illusions I recall I really don't know life at all..." Have a good day, C

Spring musings... I don't believe Phil

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So, Punxatawny Phil did not see his shadow-- early spring? Not likely. I'm not that kind of optimist. It seems like "real" winter has not yet happened--we've had more rain/slush/slop than actual accumulated snow. Not that I mind, really, but I'm a realist. The chance of us getting out of the winter months relatively unscathed is appealing. I doubt it, though. I will go on record as stating it is less possible for us to have a stretch of below-zero days and weeks, though, which is just fine by me.  I see on the news and on my social media feed that college softball teams are back at it, and that the basketball season is past the half-way mark. The seed catalogs are coming in the mail. I need to put away the candles in my windows (Candlemas was Friday). These are all signs of spring coming, but I can't believe it, won't believe it, for quite a while yet.  But I will admit to feeling a little restless and wanting to see real green grass. That's one reason...

Things on my mind, but I have no answers today (town politics)

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Short post today-- I have a bunch of points to ponder in my head today, and none of them seem to want to coalesce into a cogent essay. So, here they are, and you can make of them whatever you might wish: It makes economic sense to spend the money to "dress up" our town to make it welcoming-- nice town, more tourist dollars, and general feeling of good will Fiscal conservativism at the local level is useful, but not to the point that things fall into disrepair, while the "town fathers/mothers" sit back and wring their hands and moan about the "way things used to be" (though they never really were) Expanding the local Select Board to five is a prudent idea; three is just not a good enough representation of the size and make-up of our town Bitching won't fix things, and if you don't participate, hush your mouth Yes, we need a new elementary school--ours should have been condemned a long time ago, and it'll cost more to fix it than to build new (an...

Specific words matter--

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Philtrum. Aglet. Timbrel. Logorrhea. I'm in love with specific, little words-- the ones that people tend to circumvent when they are talking, describing the thing, instead of naming it, and by doing so, erasing part of its essential specificity. I was talking with a couple of colleagues yesterday, and the proper term for the "jingly things" on a tambourine escaped us all. I knew there was a word for them, but I was drawing a blank. The other two didn't know that there was a term, content to describe instead of name. Which, of course, is no big deal, in the context of our conversation, but still, it niggled at me that I knew there was a proper name for them. The word came to me in my sleep last night (thanks, subconscious, for working overtime).  To name things properly is to give them their power, to instill dignity. Ampersand. Interrobang. Dingbat. (Yes, that is not always an insult.) This brings me to the "Letters to the Editor" section in our local newsp...

February-- we can't find the rhythm...

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February, and it's a leap year.  When I was little, February was the most start-and-stop month of the school year. We'd just gotten back into the rhythm of things after Christmas, and then all of a sudden, we had all these days off. We'd have a day off for Lincoln's birthday, one for Washington's birthday, usually a class party for Valentine's day, and then...a week off for vacation. I can even recall doing something for Groundhog's Day. Now that I've been a teacher for 36 years, I wonder how the teachers survived. So much disruption; I think they just planned activities to keep us busy, then hit a reset in March.  It's not that different today, really. We don't have the separate days off for the revered (?!) former Presidents, and we don't have "Presidents Day" off from school in our district. But we do have a professional development half day on the 16th. And let's back it up a little: both Valentine's Day and Lent  hit th...