Ash Wednesday Musings

What to give up?

Being raised a laissez-faire Catholic, my family kinda-sorta did Lent; as in, o yeah, it's Ash Wednesday. And o yeah, we're supposed to give something up. We didn't attend church past my 6th grade year (and hardly before). We didn't really observe meatless Fridays, fasting, or any of the other requirements. To call us Convenience Catholics would have been a stretch. 

It's strange, then, I suppose, that I embraced my faith tradition as an adult. I mean, it truly hit me that I wanted to go to church, I wanted to belong. I went to confession (don't ask how long it'd been-- probably since I made my first Communion), I started going regularly, and I found comfort in the quiet. No one can call you, ask you for a favor, or anything else, really, when you are kneeling in a pew. It got my week started off right. 

Fast forward a couple years, and G and I got our vows blessed--yup, married that dude twice. And we raised Meg in the church, too-- CCD, children's choir, youth group and all. I taught high school CCD for years, too. I truly enjoyed this role, and I'd do it again, but now they've changed how CCD formation works, and I don't hike or bowl, so I don't want to do youth group. It's someone else's turn now.

Move forward in time a bit more, and I stopped attending regularly. We had a priest who rubbed me the wrong way. I know, go for God, not the man in the collar. But it got untenable (I was not the only one to complain), and we even tried to get the Bishop to do something about the situation. Well, he didn't. I chose instead to watch Sunday Mass on EWTN, which I found enjoyable. Then, one day out of the blue, I felt called to go to church. Surprise! We had a substitute priest, a very nice, welcoming man. And he announced that we'd be getting a new priest soon-- and we did, we got Fr. Mark for ten years. He's been relocated to Plymouth, and I hear he is doing well. We have a new young priest now, and he's friendly and earnest and I am enjoying getting to know him as well (though it is, admittedly, hard to call him "Father" when he's literally two years younger than Meg). 

I've been a lector at church for quite some time now, as well, and I enjoy that function. I like to read aloud, and I get to feel like I'm part of the whole thing in a different way when it's my turn. During Covid lock-down, I missed the community of my church, but I understand that God is everywhere, and I didn't need a building. And our priest and deacon did a youtube Mass for us, so that worked out pretty well. And I found Mass livestreamed from Boston online as well. 

So, back to my question: what to give up? I am not going to give up anything material. I will limit my social media intake, but that's not really giving up anything. I will, instead, try a lot harder to be patient with my family. I'll try a lot harder to take care of my physical self, so I can go forth in faith and not fear, healthier and more able to get things done. I feel like I've been a bit neglectful of the gifts and graces I've been given, and that's not very appreciative of me. God gives us what we need, and we have a lot of tools and a whole community to help us get where we need to go, physically, mentally, and spiritually. I will try a lot harder to give up focusing on what is lacking and appreciate the things and people I have. 

I will be a better steward of my resources and a more careful companion and partner. 

If Lent is about renewal, then this seems like a really good plan. 

Help me stick to it? It's not easy, given the state of the world, politics, etc. But I can --and will-- choose how I respond to all of that, with your help.

Thanks, and blessings to you all, and by the way-- Happy Valentine's Day!

C