Who is your why?

Looking for perspective lately? I sure am. I don't mean the long-view, or setting sights on the midterm elections... those, yeah, but that's not what I'm talking about. What I mean is, what's important? I recently bought a sweatshirt that says, "Remember Your Why." 

Boy o boy, do I have to keep that in focus. 

I spend a lot of time thinking about posterity, about my human community, global neighbors, etc. And maybe I need to recalibrate. Okay, not maybe. I do need to recalibrate. Why do I do what I do? Yes, there is the argument to be made that I teach for the future. I recycle. I think globally and act locally. All the bumper stickers, and then some. But why do I do what I do? (Focus on the "I" of that question.) 

So many people do what they do, or at least claim that they do, out of fear or respect for God, or out of an overdeveloped sense of duty. But yet, as Milton reminds us in his Sonnet 19:

"...But patience, to prevent

That murmur, soon replies, 'God doth not need

   Either man’s work or his own gifts; who best

   Bear his mild yoke, they serve him best. His state

Is Kingly. Thousands at his bidding speed

   And post o’er Land and Ocean without rest:

   They also serve who only stand and wait'."

We are put on this planet to make other people's lives easier. But whose? I tend to think too widely most of the time, assuming that the ones I live with and love the most have sufficient ability to take care of themselves. And they do, mostly, but sometimes, I take it for granted, and all of our emotional needs go unmet. It's kind of like the old-school ideal of a husband/father working 60 hours a week for his family, as he sees it, only to discover he's missed all the reasons why he does what he does. Spouses/partners need presence. Children need presence. There needs to be a balance, and I'm woefully bad at balance. 

Balance is not about the once a year trip, or the one time we make cookies. It's about shutting off and out the distractions for a space of time each day. Even if it's just breakfast. Or a shared task like folding the week's worth of laundry that's piled up. We forget that we actually like those people in our lives.

And they are, after all, why we do what we do-- but we need to remember the why, and measure it up against their needs, too. We'll find that our own needs are met as well. Now that, my friends, is balance.

Have a good Sunday,

C