On Linus, 2022, and resetting...

You know that part in A Charlie Brown Christmas when Linus takes the stage? And all of a sudden, the whole atmosphere of tension and chaos, disappointment and despair gets put into proper perspective? I tear up every single time I see that holiday special (and I own it on dvd, so I'm not at the mercy of television/streaming services). 

This year is the first Christmas I've spent as an orphan. It's not been easy for the last few years, first trying to take care of my dad who was incredibly lost without my mother, and then, as his health further declined and Covid raged, and then finally last year, when he was in the nursing home and still Covid raged and I could not visit him. He slid further into the darkness of vascular dementia, and the daily calls got harder and harder, to where, last spring, he forgot how to answer a telephone. It's been a rocky year, 2022, and I won't miss most of it.

So, before we go further into this rabbit hole, I'd like to say that, while 2022 had a lot of changes for me-- work changes, Frost Place changes, family, and so on-- there have been some bright spots as well. Holly is an amazing little human with a definite set of ideas of her own. I can't wait for her to learn English (I don't speak 'Holly,' so we do have a small communication problem) so I can follow her line of reasoning. Lately, she is into moving furniture. All the footstools in the house are gathered into one area, then they get moved. And her chairs. And her table. And all over again. It's fun to watch her decision-making; she gets frustrated, moves things, sits in a chair or on a stool for a micro-second to survey her handiwork, and then she's up and doing more moving about of things. It's pretty clear she is putting her own personal stamp on her surroundings. She amazes me so much. 

In this interim week between Christmas and New Year's Day, I'm taking a lot of time to rest and re-set. It's been a very long time since I've had the freedom to do so, and it's pretty clear I need it. I, who never nap, am now finding myself snoozing. Weird, huh? I spent hours yesterday binge-watching a murder mystery series I love that I got all of the seasons (!!) as a gift for Christmas. I have a huge pile of books that have been gathering dust, and I got a few more to add to the pile: those will get my attention. 

And, while I did get up and wash floors by 6:30 a.m., it's because I could. And they look good, so the housework will not reproach me when I sit to read or watch more mysteries. The laundry got done yesterday, and it may or may not get folded today. I get to choose. That is so awesome, isn't it? No one sets my agenda but me. And I canceled a dentist appointment. So there.

So this is what vacation looks like? Hm. I like it. Linus knows what matters: it's not the bustle and must-do lists. It's time I listened more carefully.

Keep warm,

C